CNN is moronic: Part II

I don't even know why I go back. To find stuff to post on this site, I suppose. But again the headlining news on CNN is moronic. Here are three of the "top stories."

Lexus parallel parks itself; Benz sees in dark
DJ's career shames family, wins acclaim
Nurse sues over ticket for anti-Bush car sticker

Is it just me or are these stories not even worthy of local news read by a woman in plaid with big hair? It's honestly like I'm reading The Onion or something.